


Eat Me Now

by ERERIWORLD



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Ghouls, M/M, Murder, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-10
Updated: 2015-01-10
Packaged: 2018-03-06 22:17:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3150299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ERERIWORLD/pseuds/ERERIWORLD
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ridden with guilt after eating his friend, Kaneki decides the one person that should kill him is his one and only sword.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Eat Me Now

I’ve lost my mind. I’ve lost it. I walked up to his house and paused before taking in a breath and knocking on it. Tsukishima Shuu was the one ghoul who wanted to eat me, and yet at that moment, I really didn’t care. I had enough. I had… hurt Hide. I had bitten into his neck and if Shuu wasn’t there to pull me off… I would have…  
I knock on the door.

“Bonjour, Kaneki-kun!” He opened his arms out wide when he opened the door. I was always surprised by his actions, but they were growing on me. He was growing on me. Touka-chan had warned me not to talk to him, to not go near him, because “he was a big pervert”, but I couldn’t see him that way. Okay, I could, but that’s beside the point. I didn’t want to be alone. Hide was in the hospital and it was all my fault.

I walked up to him and raised my hands up to his suit jacket and curled my fingers in it. I was shaking as tears ran down my cheeks. I hadn’t even noticed when I started to cry. “Shuu… why… why did you stop me? Why… I thought… I thought you wanted to eat me while… I was eating someone else. You had a perfect chance and yet…” It didn’t make sense.

He put his arms down and I felt his hands on my shoulders in a gentle embrace. “I… I didn’t want you to be hurt.” He paused as if he was thinking something over before whispering softly in my ear. I knew he was silently smelling me too as he said it. “As much as you taste good I also want to be near you for a long time. You are a treasure that needs to be kept safe. I want to be the only one to hurt you. I want to be the only one to feast off you. I want to be the one to take care of you. Not Touka.” I could feel the jealousy and I wondered for a moment if I could even trust him. I was so close to him. When did we get this close? If he wanted he could eat me right here.

“… Shuu, I’m giving you the chance to do that. I… I lost control and I don’t want that. I don’t… want to lose my human self. I am the only half-ghoul half-human. I don’t want to lose either side now that I’m here. Please, take care of me.” I didn’t want to be alone. Mother and father already left me. I couldn’t handle any more people leaving me. Death was always a reminder that others would leave you eventually. I hated death. I rested my head against his chest as I clung to his jacket. I couldn’t believe I was breaking apart to him of all people, but he seemed the most capable of stopping me if I were to ever…

If Hide didn’t make it out of the hospital I don’t know what I’ll do.

I could feel Shuu’s smirk as he wrapped his arms around my frail body and pulled me inside. I expected we’d head straight to the dinner table. I expected him to slam me down and start biting into my skin and eating me alive. For some reason, I found my body craving that. I deserved it after what I had done to Hide. We didn’t go there though. I didn’t go there at least. He set me down on the couch and then walked away into a different room. I stayed where I was thinking if he wanted me to be with him he would have carried me.  
He came back a few minutes later and handed me a warm, white mug of coffee. I saw little chunks in it and tried to pretend it was sugar. It didn’t even matter anymore. “Thanks.”  
Shuu smiled and sat down beside me with his own cup. His arm was on the back of the couch behind me. I leaned against him and sipped from my coffee. I looked up at him and realized he was warm. Comforting. “I’m sorry… I must be such a tease… you can probably smell me.”

“I can… and, trust me, you are, but that’s okay. When I finally do eat you, you will be at your finest moment where you are at perfection. Bon appétit, Kaneki-kun.”

I’ve really lost my mind. I set my coffee down and then his. That was the most romantic thing I’ve ever heard. That was the most endearing thing that I’ve ever heard. It was completely wonderful. I turned to him and put my hands on his cheeks before leaning in. “I’m gonna kiss you.”

“That is completely fine, ma nourriture.” 

I gulped when I stared into his eyes. They were calm, a complete mystery. His hand came to the back of my head and gently stroked some of my black hair. My confidence was shattered. I sat there in his lap staring at him wondering how to place my lips on his while he was playing with my hair and holding my waist to keep my balanced.

“You really shouldn’t wear eye patches. You look like a pirate and that is not cool.” He whispered as his hand came down from my hair to my eye patch. I close my eyes while feeling him pull it off. When I opened my eyes again I shivered when I saw his were endless black with red disks in the middle. “Do I frighten you, Kaneki-kun?”

I shake my head because he didn’t. I didn’t care about anything because if I wanted to die then this was the person who deserved to kill me the most. “If… If you’re going to eat me, then promise me you’ll always remember me. Never let me die in vain.” Rather than a person who hurts others, become the person getting hurt. That was the lesson my mom always taught me. I had hurt Hide in a way where he may or may not recover ever again. This was my punishment.

“Can I kiss you, Kaneki?”

“Y-Yeah…” I nodded and closed my eyes. I was expecting a brutal kiss full of blood and teeth, but what I got was a small peck on the lips. It was gone just as quick as it came. I looked down and held my lips tilting my head. “… There’s no sparks or butterflies or whatever?”

“Non. When people write kisses in stories they over dramatize it so you get more feelings from the characters, but in reality it’s just… a thing that happens.”

I nodded and looked back at him. I licked my lips and leaned forward again, placing another kiss on his lips. I rest my hands on his shoulders and wonder how he’s able to control himself even though I’m so close to him. I lean away a little and smile. “You can have a taste. I’ve given you permission to eat me.”

He let out a shaky breath and slowly leaned forward and pulled up my shirt. I shivered and stared down at him. This was going to hurt. I deserved it. He licked his lips and stared up at me. “One bite and that is all.”

I nodded, but if he decided to take more than one I wouldn’t stop him. This is what I wanted. I watched him open his mouth a little and gently place his teeth on my side. Why was he being so cautious? I felt him slowly bite down giving me enough time to get over the pain. I didn’t deserve his gentleness. By the time he bit into me completely and was pulling away, I hadn’t really felt anything. He chewed and then swallowed his eyes widening.

“Tres Bien!”

I let out a laugh and shook my head. “Everything you’ve imagined it to be?” I glanced down and already saw my flesh repairing itself. I really was a monster.

“It’s even more than I’ve imagined.” Shuu smiled brightly and wiped his mouth on his sleeve, something I wasn’t expecting from him. I felt it. The shift in mood. He was craving more and he was looking at the blood pooling at my side.

I laid back and pulled him so he was just above it. “Eat… I know you want to…”

“Kaneki… Don’t make me…”

“Please.” I closed my eyes and looked away from him.

I felt him shift before he was straddling me. He leaned down to my neck and kissed my skin, his hand landing on the hole in my side before licking his fingers, leaning away. “No. I won’t. Heal up. I’ll give your life meaning again. I refuse to eat you when you’re like this. You taste bitter.”

“…” I groaned. “This isn’t fair, Shuu, I’m finally letting you and-” His lips covered mine before I could continue.

“Hush, now go upstairs and sleep, mon amour.”

I went and fell down into what I could only assume was his bedroom. His sheets smelled like him. I held the pillow close to my face and nodded. Yeah… okay… I could give the whole dating thing another shot. I must have a thing for people wanting to eat me. I closed my eyes and tried to fight off the nightmares. After several minutes I felt an arm and bigger body hold me close and I knew nothing bad was going to happen. I just had to trust this one person, my one and only sword. I’ll believe that for now. I’m sorry, Hide, I really couldn't make up for what I did to you…


End file.
